Depression

[filthyfox]

30 minutes ago, MaidstoneFox said:

You may want to make an appointment with your GP. Sounds like you could be feeling depressed.

Don't worry about the next 40 years, set yourself some short term aims. 

I remember going through a break-up in my late 20s and feeling devastated - I was living in a town (Luton, enough to send anyone over the edge) I didn't want to be in and I was in debt. So I just tried to sort myself out with what I could control: I moved to a cheaper place elsewhere and I set myself very strict spending targets to get rid of my debt; joined the gym; found another job; started saving for a house deposit once debt was cleared. I didn't have much fun for a year, but it really helped me focus and as things started to change it made me feel better about myself.

My aim was to start a business.  Not one I could survive on; but one I enjoyed.

 

I have a job (off sick with angst/dep), but the business is an outlet for my creativity

[filthyfox]

I made EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE!!!!!!

 

 

[Wymsey]

24 minutes ago, filthyfox said:

My aim was to start a business.  Not one I could survive on; but one I enjoyed.

 

I have a job (off sick with angst/dep), but the business is an outlet for my creativity

For how long have you been off for, may I ask?

 

I know someone who has been signed off with anxiety and depression, for nearly 10 years after being laid-off.

 

I'm a firm believer of employees should definitely take time off to 'recharge' away from work, without having to use annual leave.

-

Have personally felt a bit low this week, with 2 job interview 'rejections', but have the belief things will improve eventually..

 

Am going Devon way for a 4-night stay in a few weeks.

Edited 22 August by Wymsey

[filthyfox]

8 minutes ago, Wymsey said:

For how long have you been off for, may I ask?

 

I know someone who has been signed off with anxiety and depression, for nearly 10 years after being laid-off.

 

I'm a firm believer of employees should definitely take time off to 'recharge' away from work, without having to use annual leave.

-

Have personally felt a bit low this week, with 2 job interview 'rejections', but have the belief things will improve eventually..

 

Am going Devon way for a 4-night stay in a few weeks.

My end is in sight.

I fully believe that, after changing SSRIs I will be ready in a month.

 

BUT...  as I have annualnleave in a month and a week-  I shall be ready in 2 months, and ****ing enjoy EVERY MINUTE I have left.

 

Got occupational health assessment (self requested).  I need to get back.

 

So... my job....

You want tonride someone else's horse for money?-  I licence that

You want your dog to go kennels?  I licence that

You want to buy a puppy...   you should make sure its from someone I've licensed.

You've lost your dog?  Maybe I picked it up

 

If you're a dirty mother cutting sister ****er that abuses or manipulates animals; you had better be worried.

[chrishlcfc]

On 22/08/2024 at 23:34, MaidstoneFox said:

You may want to make an appointment with your GP. Sounds like you could be feeling depressed.

Don't worry about the next 40 years, set yourself some short term aims. 

I remember going through a break-up in my late 20s and feeling devastated - I was living in a town (Luton, enough to send anyone over the edge) I didn't want to be in and I was in debt. So I just tried to sort myself out with what I could control: I moved to a cheaper place elsewhere and I set myself very strict spending targets to get rid of my debt; joined the gym; found another job; started saving for a house deposit once debt was cleared. I didn't have much fun for a year, but it really helped me focus and as things started to change it made me feel better about myself.

Thanks, I don’t need to see the GP I’ve got depression and I’m on anti depressants. Been on them years. It’s only me who can help myself at the end of the day. And to be honest 90% of the time I don’t want to. 
 

I did something positive on Friday went to the jobcentre of my own accord as I’m signed off sick and signed up to some trust who help you get back into work. Could take up to a year but I’ve heard quite good things about them so there’s a positive.

 

But as always with my life when I do something positive in my head I have to level it up with a negative and a worse one. So I got paid but I’ve had a long standing gambling addiction and I just live with it basically. Managed to stop for a year last year but just started again. Have gamstop and self excluded from bookies casinos arcades in local areas but as addicts do they find a way. Spent all my money and was supposed to be going out today so now I can’t and I’m just sitting at home depressed as anything and just wanting to jump into a big black hole and never return

[phoneticerror]

1 hour ago, chrishlcfc said:

Thanks, I don’t need to see the GP I’ve got depression and I’m on anti depressants. Been on them years. It’s only me who can help myself at the end of the day. And to be honest 90% of the time I don’t want to. 
 

I did something positive on Friday went to the jobcentre of my own accord as I’m signed off sick and signed up to some trust who help you get back into work. Could take up to a year but I’ve heard quite good things about them so there’s a positive.

 

But as always with my life when I do something positive in my head I have to level it up with a negative and a worse one. So I got paid but I’ve had a long standing gambling addiction and I just live with it basically. Managed to stop for a year last year but just started again. Have gamstop and self excluded from bookies casinos arcades in local areas but as addicts do they find a way. Spent all my money and was supposed to be going out today so now I can’t and I’m just sitting at home depressed as anything and just wanting to jump into a big black hole and never return

We all have blips, but I think the first part of your message sounds encouraging, so try not to dwell too much on the second. We’re humans and we all make mistakes, but sometimes we’re very hard on ourselves.

[Wymsey]

A bit different to post this, but find this situation quite harsh on him - given mental health issues.

 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx2lprn8ejxo.amp

 

[urban.spaceman]

Crawled out of this wreckage 15 years ago today:

 

 

Crashed it at 70mph into some donkeys stood in the middle of the road in the middle of the Kalahari, 60km from the nearest town, went offroad, then rolled it a few times before settling in a cloud of dust 150 metres away. There's been a lot of times over the years when I wondered if surviving was worth it. It should have killed me and quite often I'd wished it had. Currently putting the final touches on my project for my deadline next week. I'm hoping that the 20th anniversary of that crash will see me in a much, much better place in my life, and that's what I've been working towards the last year or so.

[urban.spaceman]

Apologies for the reflective post. Does anyone fancy writing a 4000 word essay about my project for me?

[Trav Le Bleu]

14 minutes ago, urban.spaceman said:

Apologies for the reflective post. Does anyone fancy writing a 4000 word essay about my project for me?

What's it about?

[Trav Le Bleu]

And don't say 4000 words.

[casablancas]

Copy from another thread as I’m feeling very sh!ty and sorry for  myself. This is a bit heavy so you have been warned…. Trigger warning for RTA. 

 

i attended a RTA as a bystander … was first one there and saw a lady under a truck with the wheel over her. . It is the most harrowing thing I have ever seen. She had several open fractures including of her skull and she had fat hanging out of her belly … I can’t un see it. For those that don’t know I’m a psych nurse by trade but this was well above advanced life support. 
 

I don’t know if she’s made it. It was Fcuking horrendous 

Edited 6 hours ago by casablancas

Edited 28 August by casablancas

[filthyfox]

Don't ever feel guilty about taking time out...

I just sent this to my work colleagues.  Just writing it made me feel better!

 

I don't know how much Michelle has felt able to share with you about why I'm not at work, so I thought I should drop you a line.

 

I have always been open about who I am, and what impacts my ability to be me; so  you may already know a lot of this.

 

My life is affected by two disabilities- General Anxiety Disorder (anxiety), and Obstructive Sleep Apnoea (OSA).

 

I wasn't born with either of these "friends"; they just popped up along life's journey.  Unfortunately, it has been quite difficult adjusting not only to the fact that they come with me everywhere I go; but also the fact that I have no choice but to let them come with me.

 

I will spare the full details as to how they impact me, but if you want to know; then just ask.

 

Both of these conditions can be treated so that they impact less; but, that treatment regime must be followed rigidly, and there is no guarantee that the treatment received will help forever.

 

Anxiety is treated with antidepressant/SSRI drugs.  I am now on my third different type; and in order to start a new drug, you have to come completely off the old drug first before starting a new type.  That means no help with anixety effects at all; and all your demons come to bite you at the same time.  I have been through this during this course of absence, and, indeed had already delayed this for a year.  I am now trying to find the correct dose of the new drug (fluoxetine/prozac). I also have therapy appointments through Steps to Wellbeing.

 

After two years of self funded (quite expensive) treatment for OSA, I have finally been given a CPAP machine from NHS.  This machine is more effective than the one I purchased and had to maintain.  I am also, only now, receiving medical support for this condition.  The machine limits the number of times I stop breathing for more than 10 seconds in the night, and is working well.

 

During my absence, I caught covid, which was then followed by a chest infection; so this has further hampered my recovery.  Unfortunately,  the increased flow of air from the CPAP leaves me vulnerable to this.

 

I am now incredibly physically unfit owing to a complete lack of motivation, extreme fatigue and an inability to exercise.

 

I have been signed off for a further month.  I am hopeful, and also confident, that this will be the last i will need. I have 3 weeks annual leave booked at the end of that month; and I have no doubt that what I have planned will lead to me being so, so much stronger than when I was forced to not work through disability.   Hopefully the anxiety treatment will be sustainable long term, and I won't have to suffer again as I have done. I no longer have to worry about the CPAP treatment being ineffective, as this is now being medically monitored.

 

I will see you all again on 21st October.  If I am not completely fit, and hopefully stronger and more resilient than before; then I shall just have to live with it-  I do have over half of my working life still to go, and I am sure I will meet more "friends" along the way!  I am hopeful that Occupational Health will come up with some ideas to make things a bit easier for me.

[filthyfox]

3 hours ago, casablancas said:

Copy from another thread as I’m feeling very sh!ty and sorry for  myself. This is a bit heavy so you have been warned…. Trigger warning for RTA. 

 

i attended a RTA as a bystander … was first one there and saw a lady under a truck with the wheel over her. . It is the most harrowing thing I have ever seen. She had several open fractures including of her skull and she had fat hanging out of her belly … I can’t un see it. For those that don’t know I’m a psych nurse by trade but this was well above advanced life support. 
 

I don’t know if she’s made it. It was Fcuking horrendous 

Edited 6 hours ago by casablancas

Thankfully, I was spared that when i was in the Police.

 

I don't know how you will come to terms with it-  but try to get help of  Some description, as it will haunt you for life of not.

[filthyfox]

On 25/08/2024 at 12:26, chrishlcfc said:

Thanks, I don’t need to see the GP I’ve got depression and I’m on anti depressants. Been on them years. It’s only me who can help myself at the end of the day. And to be honest 90% of the time I don’t want to. 
 

I did something positive on Friday went to the jobcentre of my own accord as I’m signed off sick and signed up to some trust who help you get back into work. Could take up to a year but I’ve heard quite good things about them so there’s a positive.

 

But as always with my life when I do something positive in my head I have to level it up with a negative and a worse one. So I got paid but I’ve had a long standing gambling addiction and I just live with it basically. Managed to stop for a year last year but just started again. Have gamstop and self excluded from bookies casinos arcades in local areas but as addicts do they find a way. Spent all my money and was supposed to be going out today so now I can’t and I’m just sitting at home depressed as anything and just wanting to jump into a big black hole and never return

It sounds to me lime you need to change the antidepressants.  YES-  lofe will be shit for a month when you come off them and change to the new drug;  but you will feel so much better for it-  it's like having a shave on a hot day.

[chrishlcfc]

5 hours ago, filthyfox said:

It sounds to me lime you need to change the antidepressants.  YES-  lofe will be shit for a month when you come off them and change to the new drug;  but you will feel so much better for it-  it's like having a shave on a hot day.

The trouble is I’ve tried about 7/8 different ones now over the last few years and GP doesn’t think change will do me any good. 
 

On the positive I have my 1st appointment at a place called shaw trust tomorrow and they work with you step by step to get back into work and are apparently pretty good so actually looking forward to that as I’m so fed up of sitting at home. I’m also going to some counselling place for the 1st time as well. 

[brucey]

8 hours ago, chrishlcfc said:

The trouble is I’ve tried about 7/8 different ones now over the last few years and GP doesn’t think change will do me any good. 
 

On the positive I have my 1st appointment at a place called shaw trust tomorrow and they work with you step by step to get back into work and are apparently pretty good so actually looking forward to that as I’m so fed up of sitting at home. I’m also going to some counselling place for the 1st time as well. 

Have you tried bupropion? If not, it may be worth looking into. It's an antidepressant which works via a different mechanism from the more commonly used antidepressants, and it has also been shown to be effective for reducing gambling cravings.

It's prescribed much more often in the US under the brand name Wellbutrin. Here in the UK it's only very occasionally used off-license for depression and gambling addiction, but is easily accessible under the brand name Zyban as a smoking cessation aid (reducing smoking cravings).

 

Edited 28 August by brucey

[chrishlcfc]

9 minutes ago, brucey said:

Have you tried bupropion? If not, it may be worth looking into. It's an antidepressant which works via a different mechanism from the more commonly used antidepressants, and it has also been shown to be effective for reducing gambling cravings.

It's prescribed much more often in the US under the brand name Wellbutrin. Here in the UK it's only very occasionally used off-license for depression and gambling addiction, but is easily accessible under the brand name Zyban as a smoking cessation aid (reducing smoking cravings).

 

Sounds interesting. I shall do some looking into it, thanks

[VLC86]

9 hours ago, chrishlcfc said:

The trouble is I’ve tried about 7/8 different ones now over the last few years and GP doesn’t think change will do me any good. 
 

On the positive I have my 1st appointment at a place called shaw trust tomorrow and they work with you step by step to get back into work and are apparently pretty good so actually looking forward to that as I’m so fed up of sitting at home. I’m also going to some counselling place for the 1st time as well. 

I ran a session for Shaw Trust once. A really good charity that get some good companies in to talk about what they look for in employees etc.

[urban.spaceman]

On 27/08/2024 at 22:02, Trav Le Bleu said:

What's it about?

It's supposed to be about my project and things in literature, theory, films and TV that have inspired it, so only I can really do it. I'm ranging from panicking about it to thinking of got it in the bag every few minutes. Fortunately it's a "maximum" 4000 words so I have no intention of going any further than 2500. Most of my fellow students were furious about it as we only had one session on it then our tutor left a month before it was due so we've had no support. 

[urban.spaceman]

On 28/08/2024 at 05:12, casablancas said:

Copy from another thread as I’m feeling very sh!ty and sorry for  myself. This is a bit heavy so you have been warned…. Trigger warning for RTA. 

 

i attended a RTA as a bystander … was first one there and saw a lady under a truck with the wheel over her. . It is the most harrowing thing I have ever seen. She had several open fractures including of her skull and she had fat hanging out of her belly … I can’t un see it. For those that don’t know I’m a psych nurse by trade but this was well above advanced life support. 
 

I don’t know if she’s made it. It was Fcuking horrendous 

Edited 6 hours ago by casablancas

Absolutely awful to read mate, I'm so sorry you had to witness that. How are you doing now?

[Trav Le Bleu]

6 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

It's supposed to be about my project and things in literature, theory, films and TV that have inspired it, so only I can really do it. I'm ranging from panicking about it to thinking of got it in the bag every few minutes. Fortunately it's a "maximum" 4000 words so I have no intention of going any further than 2500. Most of my fellow students were furious about it as we only had one session on it then our tutor left a month before it was due so we've had no support. 

If it's a maximum 4000 words, I'd just submit, "books and movies are mental, but I really enjoy them."

[urban.spaceman]

1 hour ago, Trav Le Bleu said:

If it's a maximum 4000 words, I'd just submit, "books and movies are mental, but I really enjoy them."

If it wasn't prohibited I'd just type that prompt into ChatGPT and tell it to generate a 4000 word essay.

[casablancas]

8 hours ago, urban.spaceman said:

Absolutely awful to read mate, I'm so sorry you had to witness that. How are you doing now?

I have not slept for three nights   luckily work are really chill about it

[urban.spaceman]

1 hour ago, casablancas said:

I have not slept for three nights   luckily work are really chill about it

Glad they are, witnessing something like that is really traumatising! Hope your sleep recovers.