Toon away

[Vazman]

The only possible reason to watch this match would be to guess:

 

1. What minute they will score the first goal in.

2. Whose individual error will lead to said goal.

3. How many Goal Kicks will Iversen kick straight out of play.

4. Sweepstake on who the Penalty taker will be, if we get one, and the likelihood of missing it.

5. How many Coaches, Trainers, phone a friends, Dean Smith will consult before making a change.

6. If Top and Rudkin are at the match, we can guess what they are saying to each other.

7. Guess the number of chances we get and dont score.

8. Finally how many Goals The Toon Army will put past us.

 

Oh forgot this one, obviously if your a Newcastle United Fan!

 

Edited 18 May 2023 by Vazman
Correction

[SouthStandUpperTier]

20 minutes ago, Vazman said:

The only possible reason to watch this match would be to guess:

 

1. What minute they will score the first goal in.

2. Whose individual error will lead to said goal.

3. How many Goal Kicks will Iversen kick straight out of play.

4. Sweepstake on who the Penalty taker will be, if we get one, and the likelihood of missing it.

5. How many Coaches, Trainers, phone a friends, Dean Smith will consult before making a change.

6. If Top and Rudkin are at the match, we can guess what they are saying to each other.

7. Guess the number of chances we get and dont score.

8. Finally how many Goals The Toon Army will put past us.

 

Oh forgot this one, obviously if your a Newcastle United Fan!

 

1. 4th minute 

2. Ndidi

3. 3

4. Maddison, 40% chance of missing

5. 3

6. "Are we the team in blue?" "I think so. I'm not sure. They are losing so I guess that must be us."

7. 2

8. 3

 

[Chelmofox]

1 hour ago, Vazman said:

The only possible reason to watch this match would be to guess:

 

1. What minute they will score the first goal in.

2. Whose individual error will lead to said goal.

3. How many Goal Kicks will Iversen kick straight out of play.

4. Sweepstake on who the Penalty taker will be, if we get one, and the likelihood of missing it.

5. How many Coaches, Trainers, phone a friends, Dean Smith will consult before making a change.

6. If Top and Rudkin are at the match, we can guess what they are saying to each other.

7. Guess the number of chances we get and dont score.

8. Finally how many Goals The Toon Army will put past us.

 

 

1. I think we will get past 10 minutes, so i will go for the 15th minute

2. Ndidi

3. 6 - first one will be in the first 3 minutes and will be met with a rousing thumbs up by Barnes

4. Maddison. 70% chance missing

5. Every single one. Presume Saddler needs to boot up his old laptop and load his big spreadsheet of stats which takes about 7 minutes, more if he accidentally didn't do a windows update. 

6. Fancy nipping to the Geegeez after the match?

7. Not many - about 3

8. 4 

 

We lose this 4-0

 

Edited 18 May 2023 by Chelmofox

[don_danbury]

is this the most amount of monday games played ever since joining the prem? seems like every game is monday now

[fox_up_north]

1 hour ago, don_danbury said:

is this the most amount of monday games played ever since joining the prem? seems like every game is monday now

Look at it this way - you get to start the week on a low, rather than end it. 

[StanSP]

Is Kelechi definitely back for this? 

[moore_94]

Dean Smith Pre-Match Press Conference vs Newcastle

 

Soyuncu?

“He’s back jogging but slowly. The plan is to get him back for the last game.”

 

Dewsbury-Hall?

“He’s had the injection. He’s stiff at the moment. He’ll be back in training on Saturday.”

 

Iheanacho?

“Kelechi trained today and will be in full training on Saturday as well. No other issues."

 

Liverpool?

“The result is what hurts us. A lot was said about the players not applying themselves but I’ve got figures to show they did. We matched Liverpool in running. But scorelines make the headlines.”

 

How to improve defence?

“We know we have to. That’s been the biggest concern. I don’t think we’ve taken the lead. We’ve conceded the first goal in 19 out of 20. We’ve conceded too many and have had a defensive fragility. It’s something we’ve tried to work on.”

 

Liverpool reflections?

“Our goalkeeper didn’t make a save for 32 minutes. Then their goalkeeper lumped it over the top and we had panic stations. Then we were frazzled. There was an upturn in the second period for a short time, but sometimes you have to give credit to the opposition. They had their tails up.”

 

Watching games over weekend?

“The only game I’ll be watching closely is Newcastle tonight. It may affect what we need to do, but I don’t need to watch the games, I just need to follow the results.”

 

Mood?

“They’ve been demoralised by the last couple of results. Before that, there was an upturn in performances. Four of the performances were quite good. The goals we’ve given away in the last two games haven’t been good enough.”

 

Fans?

“The fans are the most important part of the club. 2-0 down at half-time, players are going to get stuck. Us coaches have to look at it more rationally. We need our supporters. I don’t need to pay homage to these players. I didn’t buy them, I inherited them. I could criticise these players but I don’t need to. The work ethic is there. We’ve got to make fewer mistakes in the defensive third.”

 

How to beat Newcastle?

“We need to be hard to beat and use the ball well when we have it. I have a lot of respect for Eddie, I took him on in League One. We can only focus on ourselves. It’s our cup final.”

 

Evans?

“I had no qualms in putting Jonny in. He’s trained for four weeks. He was ready. He’s experienced.”

 

KDH and Iheanacho play on Monday?

“If they get through training on Saturday. Ki is the biggest worry. Kel has done bits today. Ki hasn’t trained yet. Kel has ticked all the boxes. We’ve put him on fast forward, but needs must.”

 

Playing after opponents?

“I don’t like playing on a Monday, especially when there’s only two games to go. I don’t want to change tactics based on what we need. I know we need at least a point.”

 

Confident?

“If we get the performance we’re capable of, then we can do it.”

 

Done anything different?

“We’ve put on different training sessions to what we did last week. But that was to concentrate on ourselves. We have to get the basics right. They’re down because of the position we’re in. I choose what I say about the players because I can. They care. They show that in training and in matches.”

 

Fans have given up. Has that filtered through?

“It hasn’t filtered in at all. We are in a position we don’t want to be in. My job hasn’t changed. We’re still in the positions we were. It was going to be tough to get points from Man City and Liverpool. That’s why the Fulham one has hurt us the most.”

[Tomlcfc133]

drop maddison and youri 

[Chelmofox]

3 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

Dewsbury-Hall?

“He’s had the injection. He’s stiff at the moment. He’ll be back in training on Saturday.”

[AjcW]

8 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

Dean Smith Pre-Match Press Conference vs Newcastle

 

Soyuncu?

“He’s back jogging but slowly. The plan is to get him back for the last game.”

 

Dewsbury-Hall?

“He’s had the injection. He’s stiff at the moment. He’ll be back in training on Saturday.”

 

Iheanacho?

“Kelechi trained today and will be in full training on Saturday as well. No other issues."

 

Liverpool?

“The result is what hurts us. A lot was said about the players not applying themselves but I’ve got figures to show they did. We matched Liverpool in running. But scorelines make the headlines.”

 

How to improve defence?

“We know we have to. That’s been the biggest concern. I don’t think we’ve taken the lead. We’ve conceded the first goal in 19 out of 20. We’ve conceded too many and have had a defensive fragility. It’s something we’ve tried to work on.”

 

Liverpool reflections?

“Our goalkeeper didn’t make a save for 32 minutes. Then their goalkeeper lumped it over the top and we had panic stations. Then we were frazzled. There was an upturn in the second period for a short time, but sometimes you have to give credit to the opposition. They had their tails up.”

 

Watching games over weekend?

“The only game I’ll be watching closely is Newcastle tonight. It may affect what we need to do, but I don’t need to watch the games, I just need to follow the results.”

 

Mood?

“They’ve been demoralised by the last couple of results. Before that, there was an upturn in performances. Four of the performances were quite good. The goals we’ve given away in the last two games haven’t been good enough.”

 

Fans?

“The fans are the most important part of the club. 2-0 down at half-time, players are going to get stuck. Us coaches have to look at it more rationally. We need our supporters. I don’t need to pay homage to these players. I didn’t buy them, I inherited them. I could criticise these players but I don’t need to. The work ethic is there. We’ve got to make fewer mistakes in the defensive third.”

 

How to beat Newcastle?

“We need to be hard to beat and use the ball well when we have it. I have a lot of respect for Eddie, I took him on in League One. We can only focus on ourselves. It’s our cup final.”

 

Evans?

“I had no qualms in putting Jonny in. He’s trained for four weeks. He was ready. He’s experienced.”

 

KDH and Iheanacho play on Monday?

“If they get through training on Saturday. Ki is the biggest worry. Kel has done bits today. Ki hasn’t trained yet. Kel has ticked all the boxes. We’ve put him on fast forward, but needs must.”

 

Playing after opponents?

“I don’t like playing on a Monday, especially when there’s only two games to go. I don’t want to change tactics based on what we need. I know we need at least a point.”

 

Confident?

“If we get the performance we’re capable of, then we can do it.”

 

Done anything different?

“We’ve put on different training sessions to what we did last week. But that was to concentrate on ourselves. We have to get the basics right. They’re down because of the position we’re in. I choose what I say about the players because I can. They care. They show that in training and in matches.”

 

Fans have given up. Has that filtered through?

“It hasn’t filtered in at all. We are in a position we don’t want to be in. My job hasn’t changed. We’re still in the positions we were. It was going to be tough to get points from Man City and Liverpool. That’s why the Fulham one has hurt us the most.”

Not a fan of a lot of this, obviously didn't watch it so words might not be coming across as intended. But it's not the most inspiring run down 

 

- 'I didn't buy them' ..... basically they're all useless

- 'We need at least a point' .... we need 3 mate...

- 'I could criticise them but I won't '.... this is literally no different to actually calling them shit! 

- Sounds like they've got tomorrow off. Personally even if it's just having everyone together watching clips, i'd make sure the players are in at least half day every day from now until the end of the season. 

 

[LVFox]

10 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

Fans have given up. Has that filtered through?

“It hasn’t filtered in at all. We are in a position we don’t want to be in. My job hasn’t changed. We’re still in the positions we were. It was going to be tough to get points from Man City and Liverpool. That’s why the Fulham one has hurt us the most.”

I'd argue that the players giving up has filtered through to the fans.

[Happy Fox]

Looks like Wanya Marçal-Madivadua could feature from the bench.

[st albans fox]

8 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

Dean Smith Pre-Match Press Conference vs Newcastle

 

Liverpool?

“The result is what hurts us. A lot was said about the players not applying themselves but I’ve got figures to show they did. We matched Liverpool in running. But scorelines make the headlines.”

 

Jeez 

Doesn’t he release we were running around putting fires out because he was unable to adjust our tactics (which were working first 15) when klopp countered them.  I didn’t think the players weren’t trying on Monday but just as at Fulham where we had no protection infront of the defence, they were ultimately let down by those on the sidelines ….. 

running stats don’t prove anything if one team is running making angles and spaces whilst the other is having to run twice as far to try and cover this more intelligent approach 

 

did VVD actually break a sweat ? 

[Lako42]

We need more than a ****ing point 

 

 

[Mickyblueeyes]

Liverpool reflections?

“Our goalkeeper didn’t make a save for 32 minutes. Then their goalkeeper lumped it over the top and we had panic stations. Then we were frazzled. There was an upturn in the second period for a short time, but sometimes you have to give credit to the opposition. They had their tails up.”

 

No Deano, you cant blame that (whatever it was) on being beaten by the better team. Liverpool didnt break sweat. That was the whole issue. That is the issue of a lot of fans. Liverpool cruised and we didnt lay a glove on them, at home in 3rd from last game IN A RELEGATION FIGHT. 

[sacreblueits442]

25 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

Liverpool?

“The result is what hurts us. A lot was said about the players not applying themselves but I’ve got figures to show they did. We matched Liverpool in running. But scorelines make the headlines.”

....we had 33%  possession they had 67%, and we made 331 passes to their  675, I know this is not a measure of distance covered, but you cannot make those numbers meet what you are saying, Mr Smith!!!

[shiv]

The reason we ran the same as Liverpool is because they barely ran. They didn’t even get out of second gear for most the game. Not a fan of this at all. I’m all for managers protecting their players publicly but that’s just a nonsense comment. “I’ve got the figures”  

[weller54]

30 minutes ago, Tomlcfc133 said:

drop maddison and youri 

and bloody Ndidi!!

[LVFox]

9 minutes ago, sacreblueits442 said:

....we had 33%  possession they had 67%, and we made 331 passes to their  675, I know this is not a measure of distance covered, but you cannot make those numbers meet what you are saying, Mr Smith!!!

For us to run the same amount as Liverpool when they've had so much more of the ball shows our players really didn't put a shift in.

 

Nice work trying to use data Deano but you've shit the bed there mate.

[hejammy]

3 minutes ago, LVFox said:

For us to run the same amount as Liverpool when they've had so much more of the ball shows our players really didn't put a shift in.

 

Nice work trying to use data Deano but you've shit the bed there mate.

Exactly what I thought when I read that! What a cop out! 

[PAULCFC]

55 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

 

 

Soyuncu?

“He’s back jogging but slowly.

He'll fit right in then!

 

[lee7]

58 minutes ago, moore_94 said:

Dean Smith Pre-Match Press Conference vs Newcastle

 

Soyuncu?

“He’s back jogging but slowly. The plan is to get him back for the last game.”

 

Dewsbury-Hall?

“He’s had the injection. He’s stiff at the moment. He’ll be back in training on Saturday.”

 

Iheanacho?

“Kelechi trained today and will be in full training on Saturday as well. No other issues."

 

Liverpool?

“The result is what hurts us. A lot was said about the players not applying themselves but I’ve got figures to show they did. We matched Liverpool in running. But scorelines make the headlines.”

 

How to improve defence?

“We know we have to. That’s been the biggest concern. I don’t think we’ve taken the lead. We’ve conceded the first goal in 19 out of 20. We’ve conceded too many and have had a defensive fragility. It’s something we’ve tried to work on.”

 

Liverpool reflections?

“Our goalkeeper didn’t make a save for 32 minutes. Then their goalkeeper lumped it over the top and we had panic stations. Then we were frazzled. There was an upturn in the second period for a short time, but sometimes you have to give credit to the opposition. They had their tails up.”

 

Watching games over weekend?

“The only game I’ll be watching closely is Newcastle tonight. It may affect what we need to do, but I don’t need to watch the games, I just need to follow the results.”

 

Mood?

“They’ve been demoralised by the last couple of results. Before that, there was an upturn in performances. Four of the performances were quite good. The goals we’ve given away in the last two games haven’t been good enough.”

 

Fans?

“The fans are the most important part of the club. 2-0 down at half-time, players are going to get stuck. Us coaches have to look at it more rationally. We need our supporters. I don’t need to pay homage to these players. I didn’t buy them, I inherited them. I could criticise these players but I don’t need to. The work ethic is there. We’ve got to make fewer mistakes in the defensive third.”

 

How to beat Newcastle?

“We need to be hard to beat and use the ball well when we have it. I have a lot of respect for Eddie, I took him on in League One. We can only focus on ourselves. It’s our cup final.”

 

Evans?

“I had no qualms in putting Jonny in. He’s trained for four weeks. He was ready. He’s experienced.”

 

KDH and Iheanacho play on Monday?

“If they get through training on Saturday. Ki is the biggest worry. Kel has done bits today. Ki hasn’t trained yet. Kel has ticked all the boxes. We’ve put him on fast forward, but needs must.”

 

Playing after opponents?

“I don’t like playing on a Monday, especially when there’s only two games to go. I don’t want to change tactics based on what we need. I know we need at least a point.”

 

Confident?

“If we get the performance we’re capable of, then we can do it.”

 

Done anything different?

“We’ve put on different training sessions to what we did last week. But that was to concentrate on ourselves. We have to get the basics right. They’re down because of the position we’re in. I choose what I say about the players because I can. They care. They show that in training and in matches.”

 

Fans have given up. Has that filtered through?

“It hasn’t filtered in at all. We are in a position we don’t want to be in. My job hasn’t changed. We’re still in the positions we were. It was going to be tough to get points from Man City and Liverpool. That’s why the Fulham one has hurt us the most.”

I agree with some of what he has said however that need atleast a point comment us utter rubbish...we need 3. 

 

It concerns me when you hear Vardy post match come out and say we need two wins from two and nothing else is good enough then the manager says that nothing less thsn a point will do 

[ithuriel]

Ultimate last chance saloon this game,  need a fluke result so hopes can be raised and we can balls our last game up 

[Death by Football]

Just once this season it would be nice to see some of the old Leicester City.  Scrape a 1-0 shithouse win and give ourselves a bit of hope for the last game.

[Dandy king]

CHANGE THE MIDFIELD DEANO