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Daggers

The joke thread

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Tom17LCFC

Tom17LCFC

Posted
Posted

Why did timmy drop his ice cream?

He was hit by a bus.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

I doubt it thought too much about it. it's a simple animal and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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Smudge

Smudge

Posted
Posted

This bloke was watching TV with his wife. he had the remote and kept switching between a porn channel and a programme on how to improve at golf.

After a while, his wife became agitated by this and said "For God's sake, stick the the porn, you can play golf".

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LCFC_FAN_1995

LCFC_FAN_1995

Posted
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Kate's wedding shoes were too tight. Once in the bedroom Wills helped them off.

The family heard grunting, straining, a scream and Wills say "That was tight"

The Queen said "I told you she was a virgin"

Then they heard Wills say "Now for the other one" There was more grunting and straining. At last Wills said "My God, That was even tighter"

The Duke said "That's my boy, once a sailor, always a sailor.

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Smudge

Smudge

Posted
Posted

I wont beheading Tenerife anytime soon

Ryan Air have charged Jennifer Mills-Westley's family £65 in excess baggage fees to bring her remains back to the UK.

Guess that's what you get for not booking ahead.

Thumbs-down-iStock-xsmall1.jpg

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jonthefox

jonthefox

Posted
Posted

Kate's wedding shoes were too tight. Once in the bedroom Wills helped them off.

The family heard grunting, straining, a scream and Wills say "That was tight"

The Queen said "I told you she was a virgin"

Then they heard Wills say "Now for the other one" There was more grunting and straining. At last Wills said "My God, That was even tighter"

The Duke said "That's my boy, once a sailor, always a sailor.

as shit as that is, i actually laughed..............like this...................... :crylaugh:

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