How Was Your Day?

[Lamby]

So annoying ordering something from asos but when it arrives it is too big/small. Such a hassle.

 

Stop ordering XL condoms then, you know they'll never be big enough.

Edited 9 March 2015 by Lamby

[Unabomber]

Stop ordering XL condoms then, you know they'll never be big enough.

Why are you implying that I have a massive penis?

[Lamby]

Why are you implying that I have a massive penis?

 

A smaller size would be better

[Miquel The Work Geordie]

Lamby please re-read your initial reply to Una. I'm howling.

[Facecloth]

A smaller size would be better

then why did you say the johhnys would never be big enough? Surely they'd always be to big.

[Lamby]

Lamby please re-read your initial reply to Una. I'm howling.

 

There's no way to redo it

then why did you say the johhnys would never be big enough? Surely they'd always be to big.

 

My brain didn't engage that far

[Unabomber]

A smaller size would be better

Please stop talking about my massive penis and winking at me online on a football forum that is not even associated with the club you support.

Edited 9 March 2015 by Unabomber

[Finnegan]

Doing a PhD is the long-term aim, but I'd need to put together a research proposal first, so at this point I'd be applying for 2016 entry at the earliest. I could just spend a year working at a warehouse like my holiday job fulltime, but then I'm graduating with my PhD in my late 20's with no work experience in the field.

If you're working your PhD then it's experience in itself and it opens a lot of doors.

My oldest friend finished his in microbiology and then completely left the field. Got a job as a trainee patent attorney. No relevant experience in that field, "just" his PhD on his cv.

[Unabomber]

Prepping for a job interview and keep thinking to myself "Strengths - accounts, weaknesses - eczema" I better not **** this.

**** yeah I got the job wooooooooooo!!!

[Finnegan]

Nicely done. What is it?

[Unabomber]

Sales estimator for a roofing company.

[walkerleeds]

Sales estimator for a roofing company.

 

Well done mate.

[Asha]

The irony of nussl laughing at other people being described as feminine is by far the most amusing thing on this page. Christ.

 

 

Touchy/Touché 

[Samilktray]

Got 3 different interviews for 3 different promotions in the next week. What colour shirts should I wear?

[DB11]

Got 3 different interviews for 3 different promotions in the next week. What colour shirts should I wear?

The following is a list of colors and their meanings - read this list to find which color or colors communicate the messages you wish to send out to your interviewer. Choose a base color such as dark blue, gray or black, for example, and add accents of color to show some of your personality.

Navy blue is probably the best option for first job interviews as it elicits a positive response from most interviewers. It is a professional color which adds an impression of authority, confidence, trust, honesty, loyalty, stability, reliability and credibility. Many bosses see it as the color of the team player.

Grey gives an impression of sophistication and professionalism. While it is a strong and powerful color, it is non-confrontational and does not distract – and it is less intimidating than black. Always add another color accent (not gray), in your tie, scarf or jewellery if you choose grey for a suit or dress.

Black is a powerful and authoritarian color that can be seen as sophisticated or intimidating. It is associated with strength and leadership and is a good choice for an interview in the legal sector – otherwise, use it as an accent color in a tie or scarf or jewellery.

Although many young people love wearing black, they need to realize that wearing black is intimidating and aggressive and may cause the interviewer to become defensive. It can also put a barrier between them and the interviewer. At the same time, wearing some black can add confidence to an applicant who is a little unsure of them self.

Brown gives the impression that you are confident, dependable, reliable and flexible, but it can also be seen as dated and old-fashioned. It is a friendly and approachable color that works well for many industrial job interviews.

White suggests simplicity, organization and cleanliness. It is a great choice for a shirt or blouse to go with a navy, grey, black or brown suit.

Red is over-powering and attention-seeking and not suitable to wear to an interview except as an accent color. It exudes energy, passion and confidence as well as aggression, arrogance and anger. Use sparingly, especially for a first interview!

Maroon or burgundy is an acceptable form of red for a woman’s suit but not as good as navy, gray or black.

Green, yellow,purple and orange are distracting and memorable colors that are more suitable to creative or media jobs. Use these colors carefully as they don’t always elicit a positive response in job interviews. Green is sometimes viewed negatively as an untrustworthy colour, while orange can look unprofessional and cheap. Yellow and purple are associated with unusual creative types and often not liked by older males. Use these colors very sparingly for job interviews, if at all.

Women tend to react more positively to blue based colors, such as deep blue-reds, most blues, blue-greys, most pinks, and blue-greens. Use these colors when being interviewed by a female.

To men, the yellow based colors are more attractive. True reds and orange reds, peachy-apricot along with most blues are best. Use these colors if being interviewed by a male, but only in small quantities and as an accent color.

Blue is the most universally liked color, and it creates a positive response from both men and women. It is the safest color to use for job interviews as it is conservative and non-confrontational and loved universally by men and women in most cultures.

[kingcarr21]

Fluorescent pink surely

[Alf Bentley]

Blue is the most universally liked color, and it creates a positive response from both men and women. It is the safest color to use for job interviews as it is conservative and non-confrontational and loved universally by men and women in most cultures.

 

 

There's his answer, then. He just needs to wear his Leicester City replica shirt to all 3 interviews.

[walkerleeds]

Got 3 different interviews for 3 different promotions in the next week. What colour shirts should I wear?

 

Sky blue (I know, you've just gotta try to avoid thinking about them)

[MooseBreath]

Depends on the job but I always go with a white shirt with a charcoal suit, black shoes (preferably quarter brogues but never slip ons) and belt, cufflinks with a splash of colour matched to the tie (almost always patterned blue), and a nice understated dress watch with a black leather strap and a white face.

That would be for a professional office position with a traditional dress code. If I wanted to tone down the formality I'd substitute the white shirt for blue, swap the tie for a darker colour and consider brown leather all around.

I don't think I'd consider any colour other than white or blue unless it was a real outdoor job like a farmer or something, in which case a cheque shirt maybe, or if it was one of these poncy modern "creative ie I do **** all jobs" then maybe I'd wear some hipster crap like a crop top and leggings.

Edited 10 March 2015 by MooseBreath

[Alf Bentley]

Depends on the job but I always go with a white shirt with a charcoal suit, black shoes (preferably semi brogues but never slip ons) and belt, cufflinks with a splash of colour matched to the tie (almost always patterned blue), and a nice dress understated dress watch with a black leather strap and a white face.

That would be for a professional office position with a traditional dress code. If I wanted to tone down the formality I'd substitute the white shirt for blue, swap the tie for a darker colour and consider brown leather all around.

I don't think I'd consider any colour other than white orblue uunless it was a real outdoor job like a farmer or something, in which case a cheque shirt maybe, or if it was one of these poncy modern "creative ie I do **** all jobs" then maybe I'd wear some hipster crap like a crop top and leggings.

 

What sort of nice dress do you prefer, Moose? Paisley-pattern? Floral? A little black cocktail number? 

 

The black leather strap and white face sounds a bit bizarre....S&M crossed with the Black & White Minstrels? 

Edited 10 March 2015 by Alf Bentley

[Unabomber]

Got 3 different interviews for 3 different promotions in the next week. What colour shirts should I wear?

Do what I did mate, small checked shirt grey suit grey tie brown shoes. Crucially don't forget that winning smile

Well done mate.

Cheers mate

[Finnegan]

What sort of nice dress do you prefer, Moose? Paisley-pattern? Floral? A little black cocktail number?

The black leather strap and white face sounds a bit bizarre....S&M crossed with the Black & White Minstrels?

[MooseBreath]

What sort of nice dress do you prefer, Moose? Paisley-pattern? Floral? A little black cocktail number?

The black leather strap and white face sounds a bit bizarre....S&M crossed with the Black & White Minstrels?

A dress watch Alf. Black leather because it just needs to be black leather. It obviously can't be brown leather because then it's not matching your shoes or belt. Neither can it be stainless steel because then it's not a dress watch. The white face is needed to brighten it up a bit. The last thing you want in an interview is gloomy looking accessories.

As for my tastes in dresses I prefer them short, tight and plunging. Just so long as they're not so tight as to cause testicular chafing, chafing of the old testis.

[Alf Bentley]

A dress watch Alf. Black leather because it just needs to be black leather. It obviously can't be brown leather because then it's not matching your shoes or belt. Neither can it be stainless steel because then it's not a dress watch. The white face is needed to brighten it up a bit. The last thing you want in an interview is gloomy looking accessories.

As for my tastes in dresses I prefer them short, tight and plunging. Just so long as they're not so tight as to cause testicular chafing, chafing of the old testis.

 

Maybe something like this, but a little looser at the gusset to avoid chafing?

 

[Merging Cultures]

Well done on the job Una.

Moose, not sure if taking the P!ss but I do like the sound of your style. Especially the detail on matching watch, belt and shoes. My wife hates my little watch collection I'm trying to build but it's a very important accessory IMO.