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Daggers

What grinds my gears...

By Daggers, in General Chat

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Saxondale

Saxondale

Posted
Posted

I just spent a week away on courses for my work, which took place in a hotel in Leeds.

One of the courses was a 2 day "Leadership" course. It was conducted by an external consultant ("I'm not a trainer, I'm a facilitator"). Lord knows what they paid him.

From about 20 minutes in, I spent most of the two days fantasising about shutting our "facilitator" up by beating him to a bloody pulp.

His training style was to repeatedly not finish his............................................................................................................................... sentences, with the expectation that his audience would do so for him.

It felt like a cult, with the cult leader getting the cultees to chant, Radio Gaga style.

I wouldn't have minded if he'd not been trying to peddle the same tired psychobabble I was being regaled with on similar courses in the early 90's.

Trouble was, our top managers rave about this dude and his Leadership courses, so pointing out any of my lack of enthusiasm would be career suicide.

I went along with it. I played the game. I finished some if his sentences. I wrote obvious stuff up on flip charts and then read the words back to our group as if they contained insight. I nodded along to all the recycled vacuous platitudes.

I felt like an atheist in church.

I hated myself a bit.

My gears were ground.

These clowns get paid absolute fortunes.

At one place i worked, my department got sent to do a bespoke course about...well, i can't remember what. It was just general 'motivational' stuff. All guff of course.

My manager had obviously been given a training budget to spend and decided that, because i was shockingly late every day and generally a bit scatty, i should go on a time management course.

All very well and good, except that the course content was 95% the same as the previous course, but with a few token obvious time management tips - eg. 'try making lists'.

The only thing these people are good at is convincing companies' HR departments to hand over massive cheques. Genius really.

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Nick

Nick

Posted
Posted (edited)

That I've spent the last week or two around snivelling and spluttering individuals And just when I thought I was going to have a weekend of activity have woken up this morning feeling like my head is a bowling ball and my throat has second degree internal burns.

Edited by Nick
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Guest MattP

Guest MattP

Posted
Posted

 went along with it. I played the game. I finished some if his sentences. I wrote obvious stuff up on flip charts and then read the words back to our group as if they contained insight. I nodded along to all the recycled vacuous platitudes.

I felt like an atheist in church.

I hated myself a bit.

My gears were ground.

 

This why I never got promoted (aside from non stop under performance and turning up most days hungover) I just couldn't play along with any of the corporate bullshit.

 

You should have seen my performance on a "diversity course" a few years back.

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ozleicester

ozleicester

Posted
Posted

I just spent a week away on courses for my work, which took place in a hotel in Leeds.

One of the courses was a 2 day "Leadership" course. It was conducted by an external consultant ("I'm not a trainer, I'm a facilitator"). Lord knows what they paid him.

From about 20 minutes in, I spent most of the two days fantasising about shutting our "facilitator" up by beating him to a bloody pulp.

His training style was to repeatedly not finish his............................................................................................................................... sentences, with the expectation that his audience would do so for him.

It felt like a cult, with the cult leader getting the cultees to chant, Radio Gaga style.

I wouldn't have minded if he'd not been trying to peddle the same tired psychobabble I was being regaled with on similar courses in the early 90's.

Trouble was, our top managers rave about this dude and his Leadership courses, so pointing out any of my lack of enthusiasm would be career suicide.

I went along with it. I played the game. I finished some if his sentences. I wrote obvious stuff up on flip charts and then read the words back to our group as if they contained insight. I nodded along to all the recycled vacuous platitudes.

I felt like an atheist in church.

I hated myself a bit.

My gears were ground.

 

So how do you feel about this?

 

What do you think you could have done to change how you feel?

 

In future when i want a different out come i will...............

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Sir Fynwy

Sir Fynwy

Posted
Posted

These clowns get paid absolute fortunes.

At one place i worked, my department got sent to do a bespoke course about...well, i can't remember what. It was just general 'motivational' stuff. All guff of course.

My manager had obviously been given a training budget to spend and decided that, because i was shockingly late every day and generally a bit scatty, i should go on a time management course.

All very well and good, except that the course content was 95% the same as the previous course, but with a few token obvious time management tips - eg. 'try making lists'.

The only thing these people are good at is convincing companies' HR departments to hand over massive cheques. Genius really.

One of the 'tutors' on my MBA was a very senior manager in the NHS, the only thing he 'taught' us was never answer your phone and always sit on emails for at least 24 hours, he claimed this gives you control of the communication, if the University are paying him to give this sort of advice they need some management training.

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Nalis

Nalis

Posted
Posted

One of the 'tutors' on my MBA was a very senior manager in the NHS, the only thing he 'taught' us was never answer your phone and always sit on emails for at least 24 hours, he claimed this gives you control of the communication, if the University are paying him to give this sort of advice they need some management training.

You would wonder if some people were either trying to justify their laziness by promoting such messages or if they were trying to be seen to be thinking outside the box.

Read an article a few months ago advising that when you come back from a 1/2 week holiday that you delete all your new emails received for that period without even reading them. Joke.

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Bellend Sebastian

Bellend Sebastian

Posted
Posted

You should have seen my performance on a "diversity course" a few years back.

I thought it was pretty good but maybe getting blacked up was a step too far.

We had a management training bloke in to our place not long ago and to everyone's genuine astonishment he was actually really good. The last thing you'd expect

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Dr The Singh

Dr The Singh

Posted
Posted

I thought it was pretty good but maybe getting blacked up was a step too far.

We had a management training bloke in to our place not long ago and to everyone's genuine astonishment he was actually really good. The last thing you'd expect

I got accused of being too black when I was on the course.
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Sir Fynwy

Sir Fynwy

Posted
Posted

Worst is when people say oohhh I don't like turkey cos it's dry, that's cos you aint cooking it properly.

True, I just don't think it's all that special and prefer beef, biggest meal of the year should be something you love.

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