What grinds my gears...

[marbles]

1 minute ago, Captain... said:

Her feelings are her feelings and we shouldn't just blunder through life ignoring other people's feelings. 

 

Take her feelings at face value, she felt objectified. Ignore the video and everything else. Is it right a woman feels objectified in the gym? 

 

Her sharing her experience is a point for learning not an excuse to rip into her and try and discredit.

Why not?  If those feeling could potentially ruin another persons life, should they not be ignored if not backed up by facts?

 

Again, IMO (my feeling if you will - so dont discount them) is that she did this for likes.

She went to the gym hoping to catch some guy red handed.  When that didnt happen, she pieced together a few seconds of video from her time at the gym.

    

[leicsmac]

Anyhow, as per above:

 

Matt Walsh grinds my gears. Objectionable person, as long as one considers egalitarianism and the future of humanity a priority anyway.

[StanSP]

6 minutes ago, leicsmac said:

Anyhow, as per above:

 

Matt Walsh grinds my gears. Objectionable person, as long as one considers egalitarianism and the future of humanity a priority anyway.

Yeah I had no idea of his background. Had never heard of him! 

[Facecloth]

35 minutes ago, leicsmac said:

You don't, which is why this isn't going to end up in a courtroom.

 

However, making personal decisions regarding someone's intent based on currently existing knowledge - or just a hunch - is something humans do every day.

I totally agree in the current climate I can understand a woman being wary of what a man might be up to. Its also worth noting, she's filming, pointing the camera right at him too, and talking a lot, so maybe thats why he's glancing over to her. Also as she's filming in a public space, so if he had an dodgy intentions, he'd be daft to act on them there and then.

 

I'm all for bringing attention bad behaviour in gyms, but I also don't want innocent people having their face plastered over the Internet calling them something they aren't. This one isn't obvious, there's differing opinions on it, so is it right he's now online for all to see? Most gyms have staff, if you have real fears address it with them, if they have had numerous reports the guy will probably get banned. Also I've seen a few of these videos and whilst there are a few where its obvious that the guy is being a bit pervy there's plenty that are just being edited and stuck online for views and likes, and that imo doesn't help address the issue, and it diminishes what those who have genuinely gone through things like that.

Edited 24 January 2023 by Facecloth

[leicsmac]

1 minute ago, StanSP said:

Yeah I had no idea of his background. Had never heard of him! 

That's understandable - I just happen to keep an eye on the polemic American rent-a-gobs that appear to spout manipulative and destructive rubbish, because often they clash directly with my own work.

 

1 minute ago, Facecloth said:

I totally agree in the current climate I can understand a woman being wary of what a man might be up to. Its also worth noting, she filming, pointing the camera right at him too, and talking a lot, so maybe thats why he's glancing over to her. Also as she's filming in a public space, so if he had an dodgy intentions, he'd be daft to act on them there and then.

 

I'm all for bringing attention bad behaviour in gyms, but I also don't want innocent people having their face plastered over the Internet calling them something they aren't. This one isn't obvious, there's differing opinions on it, so is it right he's not online for all to see? Most gyms have staff, if you have real fears address it with them, if they have had numerous reports the guy will probably get banned. Also I've seen a few of these videos and whilst there are a few where its obvious that the guy is being a bit pervy there's plenty that are just being edited and stuck online for views and likes, and that imo doesn't help address the issue, and it diminishes what those who have genuinely gone through things like that.

Absolutely agree with all of this.

[grobyfox1990]

5 minutes ago, Facecloth said:

I totally agree in the current climate I can understand a woman being wary of what a man might be up to. Its also worth noting, she filming, pointing the camera right at him too, and talking a lot, so maybe thats why he's glancing over to her. Also as she's filming in a public space, so if he had an dodgy intentions, he'd be daft to act on them there and then.

 

I'm all for bringing attention bad behaviour in gyms, but I also don't want innocent people having their face plastered over the Internet calling them something they aren't. This one isn't obvious, there's differing opinions on it, so is it right he's not online for all to see? Most gyms have staff, if you have real fears address it with them, if they have had numerous reports the guy will probably get banned. Also I've seen a few of these videos and whilst there are a few where its obvious that the guy is being a bit pervy there's plenty that are just being edited and stuck online for views and likes, and that imo doesn't help address the issue, and it diminishes what those who have genuinely gone through things like that.

Bang on. He might be a freak but it’s unbelievably not obvious. She has exactly the same intentions as all the lads you see on our away concourses singing ‘forest get battered everywhere they go’ whilst throwing £5.73 bottles of carling at their mates. Social media likes 

[Innovindil]

I reckon I'd almost accept the white knighting if this woman hadn't said something along the lines of she's gonna rip the guys dick off. Over a mere glance. While I'll add, she's recording HIM. Smh. 

 

She's completely over the top looking for likes and it shows like those shit led headlights on audis. 

[Captain...]

3 minutes ago, marbles said:

Why not?  If those feeling could potentially ruin another persons life, should they not be ignored if not backed up by facts?

 

Again, IMO (my feeling if you will - so dont discount them) is that she did this for likes.

She went to the gym hoping to catch some guy red handed.  When that didnt happen, she pieced together a few seconds of video from her time at the gym.

    

And this is how Andrew Tate and incels start.

[filbertway]

State of some of these comments, some proper "nice guy" energy in here

 

Trying to vilify a guy and give him a bad reputation because he's committed the ultimate sin of looking in someone's direction.

 

Scenes when you find out there's a woman dead ahead of him and he was disgustingly looking at her as well. Vile man.

[leicsmac]

3 minutes ago, filbertway said:

State of some of these comments, some proper "nice guy" energy in here

 

Trying to vilify a guy and give him a bad reputation because he's committed the ultimate sin of looking in someone's direction.

 

Scenes when you find out there's a woman dead ahead of him and he was disgustingly looking at her as well. Vile man.

...that's one way of looking at the situation, certainly.

 

Speaking personally I think @Facecloth has probably hit closest to the mark of us all.

[filbertway]

4 minutes ago, leicsmac said:

...that's one way of looking at the situation, certainly.

 

Speaking personally I think @Facecloth has probably hit closest to the mark of us all.

This guy is the king of gym etiquette and calling out poor behaviour. Strongly recommend watching it without any prejudice or wanting to disagree because someone you don't like holds the same opinion as him.

 

 

[leicsmac]

6 minutes ago, filbertway said:

This guy is the king of gym etiquette and calling out poor behaviour. Strongly recommend watching it without any prejudice or wanting to disagree because someone you don't like holds the same opinion as him.

 

 

He makes a fair argument.

 

I'll say again that we simply cannot be sure either way without more information, and while I have my own reading of the situation, it's hardly scientific and so is in no way what I'd put across as fact.

[grobyfox1990]

1 hour ago, Innovindil said:

I reckon I'd almost accept the white knighting if this woman hadn't said something along the lines of she's gonna rip the guys dick off. Over a mere glance. While I'll add, she's recording HIM. Smh. 

 

She's completely over the top looking for likes and it shows like those shit led headlights on audis. 

I'm doing back tonight at the gym, absolutely no chance i'm glancing over at the deadlift platform to see when whoever is using it is finished so i can quickly jump in before anyone else does. May become tagged as a worldwide paedo tomorrow morning. The thirst for social media likes and fame diluting a genuinely important issue we urgently need to fix. I bet this woman is the type that takes the honesty flags home from the KP, and takes about 5 mince pies at the Boxing Day matches

[leicsmac]

And continuing on a similar topic, the Beeb is doing a feature on women in Afghanistan today.

 

Everything about that situation grinds my gears.

 

I've said it before, but the incels in various Western countries look at the Taliban and see themselves, and they either say nothing about it because they're OK with it or they don't like it because there's only room for one at the top or jealousy due to them "succeeding" where such folks cannot.

[Innovindil]

14 minutes ago, leicsmac said:

And continuing on a similar topic, the Beeb is doing a feature on women in Afghanistan today.

 

Everything about that situation grinds my gears.

 

I've said it before, but the incels in various Western countries look at the Taliban and see themselves, and they either say nothing about it because they're OK with it or they don't like it because there's only room for one at the top or jealousy due to them "succeeding" where such folks cannot.

Tbh I was literally just about to suggest giving the talibananas a call and asking them how to go about gender segregation. 

 

Wouldn't have these pesky looking at women problems then I tell ya. 

[LiberalFox]

13 hours ago, StanSP said:

Why? 

He's a misogynist and transphobe. He's also a darling of the US social right so probably spreads a bunch of other nonsense. 

[The Bear]

That guy glancing in her direction was doing nothing wrong. He offered to help her and then walked away when she said no thanks. 

 

She was wrong, no matter how she "feels". She complains about being objectified and sexualised yet she wore that particular outfit to the gym showing off lots of skin. Oh and she also has an OnlyFans account, so I guess she doesn't mind it if she's getting paid. 

Edited 24 January 2023 by The Bear

[StanSP]

45 minutes ago, LiberalFox said:

He's a misogynist and transphobe. He's also a darling of the US social right so probably spreads a bunch of other nonsense. 

Fair enough, as above I wasn't aware of him before, or what he stood for. 

 

Having said that, I can't disagree with what he tweeted in this particular instance. 

[Innovindil]

35 minutes ago, The Bear said:

That guy glancing in her direction was doing nothing wrong. He offered to help her and then walked away when she said no thanks. 

 

She was wrong, no matter how she "feels". She complains about being objectified and sexualised yet she wore that particular outfit to the gym showing off lots of skin. Oh and she also has an OnlyFans account, so I guess she doesn't mind it if she's getting paid. 

Imo, none of this even matters, or shouldn't matter. It distracts from the main issue at hand and gives an out to the men actually being creeps. 

 

I support a couple of girls on OF myself, and if I ever ran into one of them I'd have absolutely zero qualms about walking upto them and introducing myself. And this is where the main point lies, if she says no ta not interested you say sorry and walk away, just like this guy did in the video, and I certainly wouldn't expect that just because she gets her baps out on the internet she'd show me irl. 

 

There's nothing inherently wrong with wanting to talk to someone, whether it's a man, woman or whatever sexual preference they have. As long as it's done with respect there shouldn't be an issue with it anywhere. 

 

Enough of this bullshit trying to separate everyone and more focus on the actual bells causing the problems I think. 

[The Bear]

7 minutes ago, Innovindil said:

Imo, none of this even matters, or shouldn't matter. It distracts from the main issue at hand and gives an out to the men actually being creeps. 

 

I support a couple of girls on OF myself, and if I ever ran into one of them I'd have absolutely zero qualms about walking upto them and introducing myself. And this is where the main point lies, if she says no ta not interested you say sorry and walk away, just like this guy did in the video, and I certainly wouldn't expect that just because she gets her baps out on the internet she'd show me irl. 

 

There's nothing inherently wrong with wanting to talk to someone, whether it's a man, woman or whatever sexual preference they have. As long as it's done with respect there shouldn't be an issue with it anywhere. 

 

Enough of this bullshit trying to separate everyone and more focus on the actual bells causing the problems I think. 

Yep I agree all that's fine in theory.

 

She absolutely needs calling out for recording guys to try and get them to look her way and then call them creeps though. 

[Innovindil]

26 minutes ago, The Bear said:

Yep I agree all that's fine in theory.

 

She absolutely needs calling out for recording guys to try and get them to look her way and then call them creeps though. 

Absolutely. It's taken generations to try and get men to express their feelings, it should take more than hunting for Internet clout to try and shut one of them down that's done nothing wrong. 

[Captain...]

It is worrying the amount of people willing to believe she was just doing it all for clicks and call someone out because she felt vulnerable in a situation they have no comprehension of.

 

There are a few things to note:

 

She was filming herself with a microphone and streaming the content. She was not filming him.

 

When he came over he didn't ask if she needed help, he just picked up the weights for her. He's already up in her personal space.

 

We don't see anything before she starts filming and she is already wary of him at that point.

 

Anyway maybe his actions were perfectly innocent and just misinterpreted, and her reaction might have been OTT but you still have to ask why? He must be pretty naive to not know that a lot of women generally don't like to be approached at the gym so just play it safe and leave well enough alone. You don't know her background and why she might react how she did i.e. how many times she has been harassed in the gym or elsewhere that day.

 

We won't know, I just find it surprising how many people are piling in on her, trawling through the internet for pictures of her and trying to discredit her rather than understand how she might have felt vulnerable in that situation.

 

 

 

 

[grobyfox1990]

12 minutes ago, Captain... said:

It is worrying the amount of people willing to believe she was just doing it all for clicks and call someone out because she felt vulnerable in a situation they have no comprehension of.

 

There are a few things to note:

 

She was filming herself with a microphone and streaming the content. She was not filming him.

 

When he came over he didn't ask if she needed help, he just picked up the weights for her. He's already up in her personal space.

 

We don't see anything before she starts filming and she is already wary of him at that point.

 

Anyway maybe his actions were perfectly innocent and just misinterpreted, and her reaction might have been OTT but you still have to ask why? He must be pretty naive to not know that a lot of women generally don't like to be approached at the gym so just play it safe and leave well enough alone. You don't know her background and why she might react how she did i.e. how many times she has been harassed in the gym or elsewhere that day.

 

We won't know, I just find it surprising how many people are piling in on her, trawling through the internet for pictures of her and trying to discredit her rather than understand how she might have felt vulnerable in that situation.

 

 

 

 

All agreed in a normal context, but this an individual who is clearly, based on past posts and online activity, trying to monetise a social media exposure profile. Other than your points above, there are other things to note:

 

She is filming him, the entire episode is centred around him, not her

He is in a gym and glancing over, there is no context as to why he is glancing over, it is presumed he's perving on her.

He is given no chance to defend himself

I've been a member of multiple gyms across three countries., and luckily they've all been very friendly, when someone is struggling with re-racking (like she was) people step in and help, this is responsible and safe gym etiquette.

Why didn't she approach gym mgt about the issue? If she did, why hasn't she posted their reaction? 

 

Overall it is likely, based on the evidence, she is trying to snare an innocent gym goer for social media likes. And she does not care about the repercussions. This is important because it's 2023, that gym goer could have his whole existence ripped apart within about 2 hours, just because he went to gym and glanced at someone.

 

On the flip side to you, it's really really worrying people are willing to allow an individual free rein to potentially ruin someone's life, livelihood, relationships, and standing in the community, over something with a very flimsy basis.

[Captain...]

1 hour ago, grobyfox1990 said:

All agreed in a normal context, but this an individual who is clearly, based on past posts and online activity, trying to monetise a social media exposure profile. Other than your points above, there are other things to note:

 

She is filming him, the entire episode is centred around him, not her

He is in a gym and glancing over, there is no context as to why he is glancing over, it is presumed he's perving on her.

He is given no chance to defend himself

I've been a member of multiple gyms across three countries., and luckily they've all been very friendly, when someone is struggling with re-racking (like she was) people step in and help, this is responsible and safe gym etiquette.

Why didn't she approach gym mgt about the issue? If she did, why hasn't she posted their reaction? 

 

Overall it is likely, based on the evidence, she is trying to snare an innocent gym goer for social media likes. And she does not care about the repercussions. This is important because it's 2023, that gym goer could have his whole existence ripped apart within about 2 hours, just because he went to gym and glanced at someone.

 

On the flip side to you, it's really really worrying people are willing to allow an individual free rein to potentially ruin someone's life, livelihood, relationships, and standing in the community, over something with a very flimsy basis.

I've not looked at anything other than the posts on here and none of it suggests she is what you describe. If there is a whole host of similar videos then I may be mistaken, to me her purpose is to stream her workout.

 

Obviously his behaviour was nowhere near overt or aggressive enough for his life to be ripped apart. I don't think anyone is suggesting it is. It is just an example of the micro aggressions we are/were all guilty of when dealing with women. 

 

He may just have been the straw that broke the camel's back, or she is highly attuned to this sort of behaviour having had it most her life. Who knows? His main transgression was just walking over and picking up her weights without asking, the looks could just be, as others have said, she was in his eyeline, she was talking. However if you think someone needs help you offer it and not just assume someone needs it.

 

I don't want the guy to get any serious flack over it. It's not about him it's about all men. I don't want her past to be raked up and a smear campaign from men who have no idea what it's like to be in that situation. It's just an opportunity for us all to stop and think about how we can avoid putting ourselves and others in uncomfortable situations.

 

If bellends like Matt Walsh didn't start sharing this shit to push his agenda, then there would be a lot less hate around. Whether it is deliberate or not his clip cuts off before he approaches her and tries to help unsolicited.

 

Anyway enough from me, if you can't see how his behaviour could make someone uncomfortable then talk to your wife/girlfriend/platonic female friend about microagressions and how they make them feel.

[grobyfox1990]

12 minutes ago, Captain... said:

I've not looked at anything other than the posts on here and none of it suggests she is what you describe. If there is a whole host of similar videos then I may be mistaken, to me her purpose is to stream her workout.

 

Obviously his behaviour was nowhere near overt or aggressive enough for his life to be ripped apart. I don't think anyone is suggesting it is. It is just an example of the micro aggressions we are/were all guilty of when dealing with women. 

 

He may just have been the straw that broke the camel's back, or she is highly attuned to this sort of behaviour having had it most her life. Who knows? His main transgression was just walking over and picking up her weights without asking, the looks could just be, as others have said, she was in his eyeline, she was talking. However if you think someone needs help you offer it and not just assume someone needs it.

 

I don't want the guy to get any serious flack over it. It's not about him it's about all men. I don't want her past to be raked up and a smear campaign from men who have no idea what it's like to be in that situation. It's just an opportunity for us all to stop and think about how we can avoid putting ourselves and others in uncomfortable situations.

 

If bellends like Matt Walsh didn't start sharing this shit to push his agenda, then there would be a lot less hate around. Whether it is deliberate or not his clip cuts off before he approaches her and tries to help unsolicited.

 

Anyway enough from me, if you can't see how his behaviour could make someone uncomfortable then talk to your wife/girlfriend/platonic female friend about microagressions and how they make them feel.

Yeh agreed about micro-aggressions, I have to walk with my wife/pick her up so she's not alone after dark, mental thing to be doing in 2023. But that's not the point here, they do not warrant your life being ripped apart, which is what her online activity suggests she is trying to do, and they do not care about the collateral damage caused in the process. Whether or not you are suggesting that is irrelevant, the inflamed language and effort to go viral on her post shows that's exactly what she is trying to do.

 

Your post suggests an entirely rational response - It's just an opportunity for us all to stop and think about how we can avoid putting ourselves and others in uncomfortable situations. - that's not real life. She has initiated a campaign to make herself money, and is not bothered about who gets taken down in the process, she knows full well what will happen to this bloke if everyone believed her, and it's not a friendly chance to step back and consider your actions. The online campaign to out her for who she really is, is far less intrusive than the potential consequences for the bloke. She will be forgotten as another selfish social media con-artist by tomorrow, he could've lost all his relationships if everyone blinded believed her and her 'feelings.'