What grinds my gears...

[Finnegan]

17 hours ago, StanSP said:

Can't stand abusive customers. Or not even abusive, just rude.

 

I did a visit the other day. Was asked to go as our contractors had had issues accessing a property to put scaffolding up for guttering/roof works - there was dog mess in the garden which they hadn't cleared up.

 

I visited, barely even introduced myself and the customer said 'if this about the roof contractors they can fvcking do one'. Straight away I said why I was there and there was no need to swear, just here to politely remind you that the area needs to be clear so the contractors can do their work.

 

Neighbour had the same issue, and was totally opposite - she was fully understanding and accepting that there was an issue and I could see her garden had been cleared of all the dog shit.

 

Bizarrely, customer #1 comes storming over, bangs on the door, customer #2 opens it and #1 is shouting her face off in front of us. She continued her expletive-laden rant as I stood there visibly shocked. Even when I offered to speak to her again at her own property she refused. She said her and her neighbour had known each other for 5 years, they speak every day, and wouldn't mind speaking on her doorstep. She walked off like an angry 5-year old to her house. Customer #2 said she barely speaks to her .

 

Oh and she said she was in a mood (barely minutes earlier) because she was on the phone sorting funeral arrangements out - as if I was meant to know that before I knocked on the door .

 

Is this on a Leicester estate? 

[StanSP]

25 minutes ago, Finnegan said:

 

Is this on a Leicester estate? 

Nope. Do you have a similar story

 

[RobHawk]

Alot of people are self entitled arseholes, I've had some stinkers and it only got worse after COVID. 

 

Interestingly enough, the worst ones in my experience are older folks, in the 50-70 age range. For some it's like they've got nothing better to do than ruin someone else's day. 

[Finnegan]

16 minutes ago, StanSP said:

Nope. Do you have a similar story

 

 

Oh between myself and colleagues millions. 

 

Was just going to play a game of guess the estate that's all

[StanSP]

Just now, Finnegan said:

 

Oh between myself and colleagues millions. 

 

Was just going to play a game of guess the estate that's all

Haha I've got plenty of others too. Bedford though! 

[TJQuik]

1 hour ago, bovril said:

Maybe not deliberately. But people don't like directness in Britain and then you have the whole 'be kind' / mental 'elf culture (like the ads you see plastered all over the tube telling the public to be nice) which I do believe some customer service people hide behind. A lot of customer service is shite here, let's be honest.

 

 

People don't like directness so customer service workers have to act like your slave or they'll face abuse from people like you. It takes a huge amount of emotional energy to do that all day which does affect your mental health.

[Foxdiamond]

22 minutes ago, TJQuik said:

People don't like directness so customer service workers have to act like your slave or they'll face abuse from people like you. It takes a huge amount of emotional energy to do that all day which does affect your mental health.

I worked in customer service for 32 years and I agree the emotional energy required does affect mental health. 

[bovril]

47 minutes ago, TJQuik said:

People don't like directness so customer service workers have to act like your slave or they'll face abuse from people like you. It takes a huge amount of emotional energy to do that all day which does affect your mental health.

I wouldn't abuse people because I know it's often a soul-destroying job on shitty pay and very often the person on the front line only has the limited information that has been given to them. But perhaps like a lot of things in the UK the answer is in improving training, pay and conditions rather than simply telling people to 'be kind'. It is a high pressure job, especially when it comes to things like health services, so it should be treated as such in my opinion. I could say that about a lot of jobs though. 

[bovril]

tbh I think I'm ruminating on something else entirely which is the proliferation of the Be Kind / Mental Health campaigns happening uncoincidentally at the same time as worsening living standards and working conditions.

[Parafox]

6 hours ago, TJQuik said:

People don't like directness so customer service workers have to act like your slave or they'll face abuse from people like you. It takes a huge amount of emotional energy to do that all day which does affect your mental health.

 

Working in hospitality is particularly shite as my daughter will testify. The abuse and the over-demanding customers wreck her shift at times. She's come home in tears more than once.

[Foxdiamond]

48 minutes ago, Parafox said:

 

Working in hospitality is particularly shite as my daughter will testify. The abuse and the over-demanding customers wreck her shift at times. She's come home in tears more than once.

I can't imagine being rude and causing upset. No excuse for it. I bet the customer would not be so obnoxious if you were there.

[ajthefox]

8 hours ago, bovril said:

tbh I think I'm ruminating on something else entirely which is the proliferation of the Be Kind / Mental Health campaigns happening uncoincidentally at the same time as worsening living standards and working conditions.

It all goes hand in hand though doesn't it? 

 

There's a better awareness and acceptance that everyone has got their own shit going on behind closed doors, so we should all try and be mindful of that and try not to make things worse for other people. 

 

From what I've seen I think these messages are coming from genuine places, although I would agree with the general point that this type of thing is dealing with symptoms not causes and isn't the most effective way of improving peoples baseline mental health.

[Trav Le Bleu]

When you go into the Transfers forum to check on the latest about a player you really want the club to buy and you find their thread is locked, so you go into the Leicester City forum to look for the signing thread, but it's not there, so you go back to the Transfer forum, check the last entry in that player's thread and find out it's cos he's moved to another club.

[bovril]

9 hours ago, ajthefox said:

It all goes hand in hand though doesn't it? 

 

There's a better awareness and acceptance that everyone has got their own shit going on behind closed doors, so we should all try and be mindful of that and try not to make things worse for other people. 

 

From what I've seen I think these messages are coming from genuine places, although I would agree with the general point that this type of thing is dealing with symptoms not causes and isn't the most effective way of improving peoples baseline mental health.

I don't know if all of the messages come from genuine places. It's unsurprising that living in our current socioeconomic system, people feel isolated, abused and often hopeless. That the responsibility for dealing with that is pushed on to individuals (Be Kind, Talk to Someone) is often deliberate in my opinion. A similar thing happened with Covid where individuals were encouraged to do their bit and made to feel selfish if they didn't. Mix that in with the whole 'mustn't grumble' British mentality and it does seem we're constantly being encouraged to put up with life getting ever shittier.

 

I realize I'm going off a tangent but I think customer services is not immune to this, although I respect people who do that very difficult and usually underpaid job.

Edited 4 August 2023 by bovril

[Stuntman_Mike]

People that upload photos on social media of themselves crying.

 

 

 

 

[Grebfromgrebland]

2 minutes ago, Stuntman_Mike said:

People that upload photos on social media of themselves crying.

 

 

 

 

These people probably need more help than they realise.

[Jattdogg]

27 minutes ago, Stuntman_Mike said:

People that upload photos on social media of themselves crying.

 

 

 

 

But they are being so brave, so vulnerable. Powerful. Inspiring.

 

[Captain...]

17 hours ago, Trav Le Bleu said:

When you go into the Transfers forum to check on the latest about a player you really want the club to buy and you find their thread is locked, so you go into the Leicester City forum to look for the signing thread, but it's not there, so you go back to the Transfer forum, check the last entry in that player's thread and find out it's cos he's moved to another club.

Or the thread is locked because people were just being dicks in the thread.

[Nalis]

When interviews, especially sports interviews after a match, just fire a load of statements at someone rather than asking questions. 

 

Likes of 'You got the win, you must be thrilled'. Wtf Is someone supposed to do with that comment? 

 

[SpacedX]

On 04/08/2023 at 12:03, Stuntman_Mike said:

People that upload photos on social media of themselves 

That's all you needed to say. 

[Izzy]

30 minutes ago, Nalis said:

When interviews, especially sports interviews after a match, just fire a load of statements at someone rather than asking questions. 

 

Likes of 'You got the win, you must be thrilled'. Wtf Is someone supposed to do with that comment? 

 

This has bugged me for years. I teach communication skills around asking open questions and active listening but most journalists haven’t got a clue.

 

If I was a sportsman I’d respond exactly to the inputs I was given and just remain silent if the interviewer made a statement.

 

I loved Ben Stokes last week when someone asked him “In hindsight would you have done anything differently in the first two tests?”

 

He just replied ”No” (then held the awkward silence beautifully).
 

Just what the question deserved. 
 

Edited 5 August 2023 by Izzy

[Bordersfox]

5 minutes ago, Izzy said:

This has bugged me for years. I teach management skills around asking open questions and active listening but most journalists haven’t got a clue.

 

If I was a sportsman I’d respond exactly to the inputs I was given and just remain silent if the interviewer made a statement.

 

I loved Ben Stokes last week when someone asked him “In hindsight would you have done anything differently in the first two tests?”

 

He just replied ”No” (then held the awkward silence beautifully).
 

Just what the question deserved. 

I sometimes wonder if sports journalists are simply too pally with the people they're interviewing.  

 

Can they really be as incompetent as they appear? Some of the questions are just  pathetic or like Nalis said simple statements that require no meaningful response. 

 

Go on then give me the benefit of your experience for free - what question should he have asked Stokes to get the sort of information he was looking for about things he may, in reality, have done differently given the chance? 

[Izzy]

5 minutes ago, Bordersfox said:

 

Go on then give me the benefit of your experience for free - what question should he have asked Stokes to get the sort of information he was looking for about things he may, in reality, have done differently given the chance? 

Well first of all it’s about knowing your audience and sensing their mood/state in the moment.
 

Stokes is known to be a bit ‘prickly’ when interviewed and he listens intently to the questions and pauses before responding.

 

In this case the interviewer needs to work hard because he could have rephrased it as an open question like “What would you have done differently?” and Stokes would just have replied “Nothing” (must try even harder)

 

We tend to ask closed questions (yes/no response) when we want information but we ask open questions when we want to learn something or gain new insights.

I’d maybe have asked things like:

 

”What were you most proud of this series?”

”Whats been your biggest learning about the team this series?”

”What are the one or two main areas this team needs to improve on moving forward?”

”How are you feeling about the future prospects of this team?”

 

The list is endless but rather than have loads of questions set up in advance, I’d be actively listening to Stokes’ answers and then my next question would follow naturally. Just having a good conversation.

 

But I’m not a journalist and my guess is they’re looking more for a sound bite/headline so probably have ulterior motives.

[Izzy]

50 minutes ago, Bordersfox said:

I sometimes wonder if sports journalists are simply too pally with the people they're interviewing.  

On this point, I think the opposite can also be true where the sportsperson doesn’t trust the interviewer therefore shuts down, is deliberately awkward, and gives one word answers.

 

If the journalist has tucked them up in the past then they’re doomed imo. Look at examples like Des Kelly/Klopp and Pat Murphy/NP. Clearly the manager feels the journo is out to get them so they go into self protection mode.

 

I think good interviews/conversations have to be built on mutual trust/respect first and foremost while keeping professional and not overstepping the mark and becoming too pally.

[Bordersfox]

2 minutes ago, Izzy said:

On this point, I think the opposite can also be true where the sportsperson doesn’t trust the interviewer therefore shuts down, is deliberately awkward, and gives one word answers.

 

If the journalist has tucked them up in the past then they’re doomed imo. Look at examples like Des Kelly/Klopp and Pat Murphy/NP. Clearly the manager feels the journo is out to get them so they go into self protection mode.

 

I think good interviews/conversations have to be built on mutual trust/respect first and foremost while keeping professional and not overstepping the mark and becoming too pally.

Yeah very good points.  You're more likely to get some useful information if your phrase things in the right way rather than being confrontational or asking just plain stupid shit.  

 

That said, I think managers and even senior players who are, at Prem or equivalent sporting levels at least, paid a fortune should be equipped to deal with awkward questions and shouldn't get p1ssy about it.  

 

Ultimately the journo isn't their mate, or certainly shouldn't be, and they are entitled to ask difficult questions where necessary.  That's not the same as stitching them up obviously.