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Daggers

What grinds my gears...

By Daggers, in General Chat

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FrankieADZ

FrankieADZ

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Posted (edited)

Now y'see none of the reviews gave high quality feedback like this!! Now thanks to the good natured folk at foxes talk I've saved £45.

yes....we on FoxesTalk...know just about everything....if the world governments knew about us they wouldnt be up the shit hole.

Oh....try...hair clippers..bog standard ones... :ph34r: .... careful tho.. lol

Edited by FrankieADZ
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The Year Of The Fox

The Year Of The Fox

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Seeing parents hitting kids...often for no reason, saw a kid drop a sweet on the floor quickly picked it up and ate it, dad went mad, he went to slap him kinda glanced him....I just thought what the fook are you doing its a kid they dont know any better and besides its not going to hurt him...makes you wonder what sort of lives these kids have, I imagine at home he is just plonked in front of the tv all day with very little interaction with his parents........I see it all the time, makes you wonder why they have kids at all, cant imagine being like that, I dont have kids but I do see my neices and nephew a lot and we always play all day barely sitting down for hours...not saying you shouild be like that with your kids all the time, but some seem to see their kids as a hinderance.

Sounds way OTT in this scenario. However people that hit their kids are not always shit parent who stick em in front of the tele type.

If a kid is running riot (not in your case mentioned) then they can warrant a smack on the arse. Yes there's other ways of dealing with it first, but should a smack be illegal? Should it fook. Yet we wonder why kids nowadays have no respect? It's because of this no smacking law/looking down at parents who do so, not in spite of it

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The Year Of The Fox

The Year Of The Fox

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There are other ways to go about disciplining children yes. But sometimes it's the only deterrent from stopping a kid doing something they know they shouldnt. Rest assured the little buggers wouldnt do it again!

I don't go with the argument that it breeds violence either. How many of you had the cane at school and then turned into Ricky Hatton?

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sphericalfox

sphericalfox

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There are other ways to go about disciplining children yes. But sometimes it's the only deterrent from stopping a kid doing something they know they shouldnt. Rest assured the little buggers wouldnt do it again!

I don't go with the argument that it breeds violence either. How many of you had the cane at school and then turned into Ricky Hatton?

Violence towards children is simply down to laziness on behalf the parent/guardian. Not only did I get slaps as a child but 'man sized punches' too. As a determined child, and one always ready to test my limits, the risk of bringing the wrath and beatdown always slipped my mind. However, I promised myself that when I had children that I'd instill a system of understanding and reward for good behaviour, so I never had to lay my hand on a child for discipline.

Now some people/parents may take the the same route, however, their reward scheme soon loses its credence when treats are commonplace and/or become the norm. The treat loses its weight and behaviour. What child is not going to risk losing a treat, if they know they'll either get it later anyways, or there's lots of other treats they'll get regardless of behaviour.

These children grow into young adults, and carry on their I want it now, and no matter what my behaviour, I expect to get what I want. Illusions of grandeur fo sho. :thumbup:

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The Year Of The Fox

The Year Of The Fox

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Violence towards children is simply down to laziness on behalf the parent/guardian. Not only did I get slaps as a child but 'man sized punches' too. As a determined child, and one always ready to test my limits, the risk of bringing the wrath and beatdown always slipped my mind. However, I promised myself that when I had children that I'd instill a system of understanding and reward for good behaviour, so I never had to lay my hand on a child for discipline.

Now some people/parents may take the the same route, however, their reward scheme soon loses its credence when treats are commonplace and/or become the norm. The treat loses its weight and behaviour. What child is not going to risk losing a treat, if they know they'll either get it later anyways, or there's lots of other treats they'll get regardless of behaviour.

These children grow into young adults, and carry on their I want it now, and no matter what my behaviour, I expect to get what I want. Illusions of grandeur fo sho. :thumbup:

Agree.with everything you say.

I inexplicably decided to karate kick my 7 year old brother in the chest (I was 10) in the dentist waiting room. I deservedly got a good hiding off dad for that when he got home from work. Can't fault him and don't resent him one bit.

As I say though, 100% agree with you, but what it all boils down to is giving kids too much respect. I know countless parents who give their child exactly what they want and when, because it's 'what the kid wants'

As an example, do you ever watch Escape To The Country or similar shows? It does my head in when the parents 1. Ask for kids opinion on whether they like the houseand 2. Would try and reason with said child if the kid objected to moving into said house.

It's old fashioned I know, and perhaps I should have lived in the 50s but I strongly agreed thatto a point children should be seen and not heard

Edited by lcfcstu
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Guest Col city fan

Guest Col city fan

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Violence towards children is simply down to laziness on behalf the parent/guardian. Not only did I get slaps as a child but 'man sized punches' too. As a determined child, and one always ready to test my limits, the risk of bringing the wrath and beatdown always slipped my mind. However, I promised myself that when I had children that I'd instill a system of understanding and reward for good behaviour, so I never had to lay my hand on a child for discipline.

Now some people/parents may take the the same route, however, their reward scheme soon loses its credence when treats are commonplace and/or become the norm. The treat loses its weight and behaviour. What child is not going to risk losing a treat, if they know they'll either get it later anyways, or there's lots of other treats they'll get regardless of behaviour.

These children grow into young adults, and carry on their I want it now, and no matter what my behaviour, I expect to get what I want. Illusions of grandeur fo sho. :thumbup:

I think you maybe paint a somewhat utopian picture of understanding and reward. Such reward requires complete consistency. And as such, requires that parent(s) have the time neccessary to develop such a programme with their children. Each parent must know what the reward is, what the conditions are and when to provide the reward or to withhold it.

Herein lies the problem IMO. So many families these days go to work all hours, women as well as men and give their children to childminders, nurserys, grandparents and the such like that it becomes very difficult to maintain the behavioural programme across so many different involved parties. If a child is allowed to behave in a certain way at a childminders, or at nursery or with their grandparents, and are then expected to behave somewhat differently with their parent(s), they can quickly become confused if the consistent approach is not maintained.

Whilst I agree with you in principle, I think it's much harder to achieve in practice. It sounds like you were probably able to do this.

Parenting properly takes a massive amount of effort to get it as right as you possibly can. I believe that some people seem to have children without appreciating the amount of time, dedication and understanding of a process that is really required to bring them up well. If you achieved this I commend you for your dedication.

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Captain...

Captain...

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Hitting kids is a tough one, in the example of the child picking his sweet up off the floor I understand why the parent would want to discourage that behavior. I posted a few weeks ago in the thread about deadly nightshade being found in parks and how I remember being hit once when I was a kid for trying to eat a berry. I didn't really understand at the time as I had seen my dad do it, but telling me some berries are good and some are bad and then explaining the difference between all the good and bad berries was just not practical thing to do. Instead I was made very aware that I was not to pick and eat any berries myself, but I could have some given to me by my dad.

There is a time and a place for different types of discipline and parents need to be able to judge when that is, excessive hitting and smacking shouldn't be allowed but then neither should some of the psychological abuse that some children get. Abusive parents will always find a way to be abusive, god knows why these people have kids in the first place.

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purpleronnie

purpleronnie

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Hitting kids is a tough one, in the example of the child picking his sweet up off the floor I understand why the parent would want to discourage that behavior. I posted a few weeks ago in the thread about deadly nightshade being found in parks and how I remember being hit once when I was a kid for trying to eat a berry. I didn't really understand at the time as I had seen my dad do it, but telling me some berries are good and some are bad and then explaining the difference between all the good and bad berries was just not practical thing to do. Instead I was made very aware that I was not to pick and eat any berries myself, but I could have some given to me by my dad.

There is a time and a place for different types of discipline and parents need to be able to judge when that is, excessive hitting and smacking shouldn't be allowed but then neither should some of the psychological abuse that some children get. Abusive parents will always find a way to be abusive, god knows why these people have kids in the first place.

So the only way to discourage a kid from eating a sweet he had just dropped was smacking him?

beggers belief.

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Raw Dykes

Raw Dykes

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I'm probably the only one, but this gets on my nerves. People still saying the year as, "Two-thousand and x". Why say, "Two-thousand and thirteen", when you can just say "Twenty thirteen" instead?

"Do you remember when England won the world cup?" "Who could forget? It was one thousand, nine hundred and sixty-six."

"Tonight we're going to party like it's one thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine."

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sphericalfox

sphericalfox

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Depends on the kid really, some will respond better to the carrot or the stick.

All kids respond to the carrot, like I said before, it depends on the parent, and whether they are too lazy to be consistent and instigate the process from birth. If kids see parents being slovenly, greedy and argumentative, they will automatically assume that's the way to be, and copy the behaviour. Whilst this isn't the case in all instances it's one that can be recognised as common place these days.

Anyway this conversation should be in a thread of its own, and I am worse for continuing it in GMG. :blush:

Edited by sphericalfox
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