KFS Posted 30 July 2011 Share Posted 30 July 2011 Pretty sure it happened today! I'm in the Megastore trying out a new top, didn't fit so I came out of the changing room getting weird looks.. Walked up to a girl and told her i needed a mediun shirt.. She looks at me funny, can't find a medium home shirt, and stops me and says, "do you know that your shirt is back to front, sir?" fvcking ridiculous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stix Posted 30 July 2011 Share Posted 30 July 2011 Had quite an embarrassing thing happen to me at Sainsburys at Fosse Park the other day.. Walking through the car park I see this car rolling forward, and a kid in the passenger seat shouting 'DAD, DADDD'.. He'd let the handbrake down when his dad had nipped into the shop.. So like a hero I sprint over, and jump in this moving car to try and save the kid.. As I've jumped in the car the kids already pulled the handbrake back up, and his dads walked around the corner... So now I'm here, in a car 20 yards from where the dad had parked it, alone with a child no more than 10 years old screaming for his dad... The conversation that followed was rather awkward.. Thats amazing. i think alot of people would have asked the questions after kicking your arse!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General Smuts Posted 31 July 2011 Share Posted 31 July 2011 I done a dinky wink Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Posted 13 August 2011 Share Posted 13 August 2011 Had quite an embarrassing thing happen to me at Sainsburys at Fosse Park the other day.. Walking through the car park I see this car rolling forward, and a kid in the passenger seat shouting 'DAD, DADDD'.. He'd let the handbrake down when his dad had nipped into the shop.. So like a hero I sprint over, and jump in this moving car to try and save the kid.. As I've jumped in the car the kids already pulled the handbrake back up, and his dads walked around the corner... So now I'm here, in a car 20 yards from where the dad had parked it, alone with a child no more than 10 years old screaming for his dad... The conversation that followed was rather awkward.. Yeah, blokes and kids. It's ridiculous that men are scared to intervene out of fear of being labelled 'Mr. Daggers' I saw a child in a shopping centre screaming and clearly lost. Information centre was 40 yards away. Walked the kid toward the help desk, in comes panicked parent and screams "What the hell do you think you are doing?" What I should of said was, "Well, I'm either abducting your already lost child or I'm taking him to the information centre, just there you daft cow" What I actually said in front of loads of other by standing shoppers was " Huh err, sorry, I was, Oh no, no, no I just saw him and he was upset and thought......" Fantastic bit of talking. (Wish my response wasn't to have grabbed the kid and started running now.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wymsey Posted 13 August 2011 Share Posted 13 August 2011 Probably when I wolf-whistled at some Leicester High School girls when I was around 11-12 behind the school gates and getting an earful by the teacher in charge of break time. Everyone laughed as she told me to go to some room and do detention for the rest of that afternoon, just for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr whippy Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 In Florida at the moment on holiday. Went for a meal with the wife and kids on Monday evening then went for a walk on my own to the hire car for a sneaky smoke. As soon as I got to the car my stomach started making gurgling noises and I knew the inevitable would happen. Legs were crossed as tight as I could squeeze them but there was no way that I could make it to the bog. I opened the front and back doors to give a bit of privacy then ripped off the shorts and boxers then the floodgates opened. To cut a long story short I basically shat about half the load into the drivers footwell and under the seat. Cleaned it up as best I could with my boxers and a couple of nappies that were in the boot. The car reeks after being in near 100 degree heat despite my best efforts at cleaning it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Year Of The Fox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 was with my gf one night and we were both drunk, her 18th birthday, we went back to her house to find her mum and dad having sex on the sitting room floor, (awkward!!!), being drunk i asked her dad if he needed any help that didn't go down well with my gf and we had this massive row (she didn't think it was funny) we split up a week later, her mum was filth though Haha that is brilliant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Year Of The Fox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I went for a night out in Ashby last year and ended up bladdered in coalville. The missis and her mate were in the same pub. i decided i couldnt drink anymore so went home after buying a chicken wrap. I went to bed and woke up with my missus and her mate giggling at me. I live in a terrace house with the lounge window being at the front. For some reason I got bollock naked turned the light on, opened the curtains in the lounge and fell asleep on the sofa in full view of the window. God knows how many people had walked past and seen me in all my glory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parafox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 In Florida at the moment on holiday. Went for a meal with the wife and kids on Monday evening then went for a walk on my own to the hire car for a sneaky smoke. As soon as I got to the car my stomach started making gurgling noises and I knew the inevitable would happen. Legs were crossed as tight as I could squeeze them but there was no way that I could make it to the bog. I opened the front and back doors to give a bit of privacy then ripped off the shorts and boxers then the floodgates opened. To cut a long story short I basically shat about half the load into the drivers footwell and under the seat. Cleaned it up as best I could with my boxers and a couple of nappies that were in the boot. The car reeks after being in near 100 degree heat despite my best efforts at cleaning it up. Did your family notice? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21st Century Fox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I pretty sure with some more thought I could fill an entire page of this thread. Regardless of the time I kissed my girlfriends Gran on the lips, there's the time I saw that same girlfriends mum naked on Skype, the time I accidentally threw a girl through a greenhouse, tore my ballsack (that requires some explaining) and the time I put a pair of swimming trunks on horribly wrong and displayed all the goods to my entire junior school class. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HEGGSY Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I want to find that Ric Flair story thread about the dirty Geordie bird Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ADK Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I once voted UKIP in an MEP election. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr whippy Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Did your family notice? Oh yes. Impossible not to notice. The wife knows what happened but I have been blaming it on my 2 year old to my older kids Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lavrentis Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Getting banned from a particular uni halls for doing something stupid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kingfox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Had my trousers pulled down on Fullhurst School field, and they hanged them up on top of the gates over the spikes, people in the cars going past kept laughing and staring. So I got my friends jacket and tied it round me, and threatened to piss over it, if they didn't give me my pants back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lamby Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 About 2 years ago I'd been to the Cafe for lunch and obviously had a dodgy egg or something that turned my stomach to shit during the night. So I've woken up and could feel something wet, so I've put my hand on the bed to see what it is, turned out the dodgy egg has made me shat myself in the night while I was sleeping. I carried on shitting tor most of the day, but I did manage to have lunch at Nando's without shitting myself in there though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Quick Brown Fox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Once while out shopping with my ex wife I turned around and said to her "come on let's go I'm dying for a shit", only for it not to be her stood behind me but a young girl that worked in the shop. I didn't know what to say or do, so just found and grabbed the mrs and walked straight out the door not looking back. The mrs wasn't happy, but laughed hard when I told her what had happened. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HEGGSY Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 http://www.foxestalk.co.uk/forums/topic/78383-fao-ric-flair-or-any-other-suitable-candidates/ Yes! lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rincewind Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I went for a night out in Ashby last year and ended up bladdered in coalville. The missis and her mate were in the same pub. i decided i couldnt drink anymore so went home after buying a chicken wrap. I went to bed and woke up with my missus and her mate giggling at me. I live in a terrace house with the lounge window being at the front. For some reason I got bollock naked turned the light on, opened the curtains in the lounge and fell asleep on the sofa in full view of the window. God knows how many people had walked past and seen me in all my glory. Did you stand in front of the window in the morning and stretch your arms only to be greeted by an admiring crowd of onlookers? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StanSP Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Surely you could have gone outside, Mrwhippy, instead of going out in a car that YOU will be driving ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr whippy Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I was trying to go outside. I tried to make it as quick as possible to avoid suspicion and fully intended to go on the floor, I think my haste coupled with the back pressure caused the accident. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Quick Brown Fox Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Mr Whippy, Is this accident where you got the idea for your username? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lamby Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I walked in on one of my ex's mums having a shit once, why the toilet door was left open I'll never know...she didn't notice thank god but no one knows abut this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lamby Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 I also had my first ex's brother walk in on us doing the deed, he didn't actually even notice anything was happening which was rather good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stinkenzo Posted 21 August 2013 Share Posted 21 August 2013 Had quite an embarrassing thing happen to me at Sainsburys at Fosse Park the other day.. Walking through the car park I see this car rolling forward, and a kid in the passenger seat shouting 'DAD, DADDD'.. He'd let the handbrake down when his dad had nipped into the shop.. So like a hero I sprint over, and jump in this moving car to try and save the kid.. As I've jumped in the car the kids already pulled the handbrake back up, and his dads walked around the corner... So now I'm here, in a car 20 yards from where the dad had parked it, alone with a child no more than 10 years old screaming for his dad... The conversation that followed was rather awkward.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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